On Forgiveness

This blog is based on  the teachings of cousin's Guruji Krishnananda. 

   “What is forgiveness?” I have been asked this question many times. Another question that is asked is, “What is beyond forgiveness?”

             Let us understand that forgiveness is not an act of kindness towards another person.

             Forgiveness is an act of surrender. The unconditional acceptance and surrender releases us from the bondage of resentment and bitterness.

             What is beyond forgiveness?

             Beyond forgiveness and surrender there is total freedom. It is an irony that only when we surrender, we are truly free, and, only when we are free, we can surrender.

             It is generally understood that when we surrender, we lose our freedom. It may seem like a contradiction but it is not so. Surrendering is not giving up our freewill; it is consciously aligning with the Divine Will in every situation. Contemplate on this.

             Forgiveness and surrender lead to the experience of Oneness with the Divine. After forgiveness and surrender, there is only Love and Light.

            To realise this, we have to actually practise it and see. Otherwise, all this will be just an intellectual understanding.

            When you get hurt, try to forgive unconditionally. It is not easy. But if you succeed, you would have made a great stride in your Spiritual journey.

Through a Rapist's Eyes

This really is not a blog...like a creation of my own  

A friend sent this article to me. It pertains to women in the USA, but it will help women everywhere to understand the mind of a rapist and to protect themselves. I was scavenging thru my mail box and found this.
If you find this worth, please do circulate.........

Through a Rapist's Eyes  

When this was sent to me, I was told to forward it to my lady friends, but I forwarded it to most 
everyone in my address book. My male friends have female friends and this Information is too important to  miss someone.

Please pass it along and share it with your children.

 A group of rapists and date rapists in prison were interviewed on what  they look for in a potential victim 
and here are some interesting facts:

1)The first thing men look for in a potential victim is hairstyle. They are most likely to go after a woman with 
a ponytail, bun, braid  or other hairstyle that can easily be grabbed . They are also likely to go after a woman 
with long hair . Women with short hair are not common targets.

2) The second thing men look for is clothing. They will look for women who's clothing is easy to remove quickly. 
Many of them carry scissors around specifically to cut clothing.

3) They also look for women on their cell phone, searching through their purse, or doing other activities while 
walking because they are off-guard and can be easily overpowered.

4) Men are most likely to attack & rape in the early morning, between 5:00 a.m. and 8:30 a.m.

5) The number one place women are abducted from/attacked is grocery store parking lots. The number two: 
office parking lots/garages. Number three: public restrooms.

6) The thing about these men is that they are looking to grab a woman and quickly move her to another 
location where they don't have to worry about getting caught.

7) Only 2% said they carried weapons because rape carries a 3-5 year sentence but rape with a weapon is 15-20 years.

8) If you put up any kind of a fight at all, they get discouraged because it only takes a minute or two for them 
to realize that going after you isn't worth it because it will be time-consuming.

9) These men said they would not pick on women who have umbrellas, or other similar objects that can be used from a distance, in their hands

Keys are NOT a deterrent because you have to get really close to the attacker to use them as a weapon. 
So, the idea is to convince these guys you're not worth it.

10) Several defence mechanisms he taught us are: If someone is following behind you on a street or in a 
garage or with you in an elevator or stairwell, look them in the face and ask them a question, like what 
time is it?, or make general small talk: 'I can't believe it is so cold out here,' 'We're in for a bad winter.' 
Now you've seen their face and could identify them in a line-up; you lose appeal as a target.

11) If someone is coming toward you, hold out your hands in front of you and yell STOP! or STAY BACK! 
Most of the rapists this man talked to said they'd leave a woman alone if she yelled or showed that she would 
not be afraid to fight back. Again, they are looking for an EASY target.

12) If you carry pepper spray (this instructor was a huge advocate of it and carries it with him wherever 
he goes), yell I HAVE PEPPER SPRAY and holding it out will be a deterrent.

13) If someone grabs you, you can't beat them with strength but you can by outsmarting them. If you are 
grabbed around the waist from behind, pinch the attacker either under the Arm (between the elbow and armpit) 
OR in the upper inner thigh VERY VERY HARD. One woman in a class this guy taught told him she used the 
underarm pinch on a guy who was trying to date rape her and was so upset she broke through the skin and tore 
out muscle strands - the guy needed stitches. Try pinching yourself in those places as hard as you can stand it - it hurts.

14) After the initial hit, always GO for the GROIN. I know from a particularly unfortunate experience that if you slap 
a guy's parts it is extremely painful. You might think that you'll anger the guy and make him want to hurt you more, 
but the thing these rapists told our instructor is that they want a woman who will not cause a lot of trouble. 
Start causing trouble and he's out of there.

15) When the guy puts his hands up to you, grab his first two fingers and bend them back as far as possible 
with as much pressure pushing down on them as possible. The instructor did it to me without using much pressure, 
and I ended up on my knees and both knuckles cracked audibly.

16) Of course the things we always hear still apply. Always be aware of your surroundings, take someone with you 
if you can and if you see any odd behaviour, don't dismiss it, go with your instincts!!!

You may feel a little silly at the time, but you'd feel much worse if the guy really was trouble.

1. Tip from Tae Kwon Do : The elbow is the strongest point on your body. If you are close enough to use it, do!

2. Learned this from a tourist guide in New Orleans : If a robber asks for your wallet and/or purse, 
DO NOT HAND IT TO HIM. Toss it away from you....chances are that he is more interested in your wallet and/or 
purse than you, and he will go for the wallet/purse. RUN LIKE MAD IN THE OTHER DIRECTION!

3. If you are ever thrown into the trunk of a car, kick out the back tail lights and stick your arm out the hole and 
start waving like crazy. The driver won't see you, but everybody else will. This has saved lives.

4. Women have a tendency to get into their cars after shopping, eating, working, etc, and just sit (doing their 
checkbook, or making a list, etc.) DON'T DO THIS! The predator will be watching you, and this is the perfect 
opportunity for him to get in on the passenger side, put a gun to your head, and tell you where to go. AS SOON 
AS YOU GET INTO YOUR CAR, LOCK THE DOORS AND LEAVE.

a. If someone is in the car with a gun to your head DO NOT DRIVE OFF, repeat: DO NOT DRIVE OFF! Instead gun 
the engine and speed into anything, wrecking the car. Your Air Bag will save you. If the person is in the back seat 
they will get the worst of it. As soon as the car crashes bail out and run. It is better than having them find your 
body in a remote location.

5 A few notes about getting into your car in a parking lot or parking garage:

A.) Be aware: look around you, look into your car, at the passenger side floor, and in the back seat.

B.) If you are parked next to a big van, enter your car from the passenger door..... Most serial killers attack 
their victims by pulling them into their vans while the women are attempting to get into their cars.

C.) Look at the car parked on the driver's side of your vehicle, and the passenger side. If a male is sitting 
alone in the seat nearest your car, you may want to walk back into the mall, or work, and get a guard/policeman to walk you back out.

IT IS ALWAYS BETTER TO BE SAFE THAN SORRY. (And better paranoid than dead.)

6. ALWAYS take the elevator instead of the stairs. (Stairwells are horrible places to be alone and the 
perfect crime spot. This is especially true at NIGHT!)

7. If the predator has a gun and you are not under his control, ALWAYS RUN! The predator will only hit you 
(a running target) 4 in 100 times. And even then, it most likely WILL NOT be a vital organ. RUN, preferably 
in a zigzag pattern!

8. As women, we are always trying to be sympathetic: STOP! It may get you raped or killed. Ted Bundy, 
the serial killer, was a good-looking, well-educated man, who ALWAYS played on the sympathies of unsuspecting 
women. He walked with a cane, or a limp, and often asked 'for help' into his vehicle or with his vehicle, which 
is when he abducted his next victim.

9. Another Safety Point: Someone just told me that her friend heard a crying baby on her porch the night 
before last, and she called the police because it was late and she thought it was weird. The police told her 
'Whatever you do, DO NOT open the door.'

The lady then said that it sounded like the baby had crawled near a window, and she was worried that it would 
crawl to the street and get run over. The policeman said, 'We already have a unit on the way, whatever you do, 
DO NOT open the door.' He told her that they think a serial killer has a baby's cry recorded and uses it to coax 
women out of their homes thinking that someone dropped off a baby. He said they have not verified it, but have 
had several calls by women saying that they hear baby's cries outside their doors when they're home alone at night.

Please pass this on and DO NOT open the door for a crying baby ---
This should be taken seriously because the Crying Baby theory was mentioned on America's Most Wanted this past 
Saturday when they profiled the serial killer in Louisiana .
 
I'd like you to forward this to all the women you know. It may save a life. A candle is not dimmed by lighting 
another candle. I was going to send this to the ladies only, but guys, if you love your mothers, wives, sisters, 
daughters, etc., you may want to pass it onto them, as well.
  
" Life is like a coin. You can spend it anyway you like but....you can only spend it once"